Childhood Memories and Motherly Woes

I was having lunch earlier with my colleagues in the office, Mikey,the youngest son of our COO, dropped by. He has a pedia's appointment in the afternoon and mommy will bring him there.

When he arrived he passed by us, eyes all droopy and gloomy, like he was perenially sleepy, and was dragging his body into the office. When he and his mommy went out to join us for lunch, he was listless. Mommy told us that he has "just cried" for he just had a fight with his yaya. I felt for the poor kid. Then Joy, the assistant here in the office, gave him his Chickenjoy lunch and after a few mouthfuls he was happy again and was making kulit about our company outing tomorrow.

As I was watching that change of temperament due to Chickenjoy, I imagine myself being in my boss' shoes, with a child that changes moods faster than a mood ring. And I'm both scared and excited at the same time.

I never experienced taking care of a child before. When my brother was born my mom hired a yaya because she has to go to work, plus I'm still a tot that time so, obviously, I can't fend for myself yet. Until I grew up I never really held a baby for so long. One, the grown-ups never trusted me; second, I'm afraid I might do something stupid that will put that baby's life in peril. Like the one time my lola asked me to look after one of my baby cousins (I was 11 at the time), I almost dropped him to the floor, which could've been a disaster, not to mention fatal (both for my cousin and me).

I have always said to myself that when I become a mom, I will be a better mom that my own mother. Since I was a really pasaway kid that time, I thought that it would be a good way to spite her, to get back at her for pinching my ears when she caught me eating chocolates in bed when I was 8. Before I used to think that any mom is better than mine, and I am envious of my friends' moms who allow them to go to the mall on their own or play outside. And my dear mama would always tell me that someday all the bad things I did to her would get back to me when I have kids of my own. It's like I'm being cursed or something.

Then I grew up, went through four years in high school, survived four years of college living on my own, and now, so far, surviving six months as part of the work force. Before I know it i'll be going towards the next phase in my life: courtship, then hopefully marriage and family life.

One of the SS' favorite topic of conversation is GB TALKS. Musings on our GBs (God's Best), waiting on the Lord and the prospect of finally meeting that special person that God has set apart just for you. For three girls who have not had boyfriends yet, the thought is quite exciting, but since we're in the Lord, we have learned to actively wait, and not just daydream about that person. Although we all wish that a particular person be our GB, God's thoughts and ways are not the same as ours (right on Isaiah [55:8-9]!).

I can't wait to get to that phase, though at the same time I am quite happy being single :) How long I'll have to wait for that, only God knows. But I believe that when it does happen, it will be the sweetest thing in the whole world.